10/12/2013 11:01![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
my_thestral
my_thestralJust for the record - the above question was not posed by any of my sons, because:
1) the little one is too young;
2) the elder one's jaw seems to hit the ground every time there's a (semi) naked lady in sight and he continually comes home from school with questions such as: "Mom, are your titties big?" (insert silly grin) and "Mom, do girls having sex have to have their bras on?" (insert insane neurotic laughter and a gawping face of this mother) - he's 7!!! Seven (with a word, unless someone thinks I mistyped it)! Where does he get the ideas?! What is he discussing with his friends!? Mind you - I use every excuse I can find to keep him off the Internet and when he's using it, it's in the living room, under my supervision. And still he comes home with this.
So, no, it was not my children, but my friend's son (6), who posed the question. Apparently he hasn't been influenced by the overly-sexualized society we live in - yet. She was lost for words. I felt like saying: you'll understand, little man, in about 10 years, when the hormones kick in. But then, perhaps, it will be the right time for him to understand, the teenage years are meant to be over-flooded with thoughts and shifting mind-sets regarding sexuality, while this type of question makes perfect sense to me from the stand-point of a confused child, growing up in a society where sex sell practically anything from cars to washing powders and is, as such, beyond his comprehension.
But the overly-sexualized society is our sad reality and hardly any innocence is left once it's done with the kids - and at the very young age at that, as my son's inappropriate questions attest to! Too bad that most of the time the concepts like love and genuine affection get lost in the onslaught of sensory experiences, in many ways connected to nudity and the concept of a "perfect body". By the time children hit their teens, they are usually quite brain-washed into believing there is just "one beauty" (and by that I mean beauty ideals, such as being skinny - or muscled, in case of boys; properly made up/groomed to even be presentable - this is where the industry hits with the make up products; and dressed up to fit the latest and the greatest of what's currently "in" - again, much to the joys of many a-industry) - and in many cases beauty and success are strongly related with "having" rather than "being". So we've created a society in which having the latest iPhone by far surpasses the importance of actually being a skilled communicator. Who cares if you can't talk right, as long as you have the means to do it, right?
I suppose it pays off to the capitalist society to make young people believe they are always lacking something - they're never quite as skinny as this or other celebrity, their clothes and accessories NEED to be the latest and the greatest or they'll be the laughing stock and it is producing generations of unhappy young people, some miserably obese, while constantly bothering with diets; literally willing to sell their kidneys on a black market for the newest iPhone! So you have a girl of 12 (I was her au-pair in London back in 1996) who's trying to "shave" her absolutely hair-free legs, because she saw it in a magazine. Another thing I saw when I was in England recently almost flipped me on my large behind: it was absolutely freezing around midnight in the centre of London on a Friday night, but it was swarming with teenage girls in sleeveless low-cut mini-skirts (and purple arms), waiting at the clubs to be allowed in. Is the human instinct to reproduce so strong that it challenges your survival instinct?! I know it's important to fit in, but don't those girls have mothers with more sense than hormones!?
This society is leaving very little room for idiosyncrasy - a lot of people are literally afraid to admit their preferences for something other than what's considered "ideal". If a guy likes a girl with curves, he has a "fat chick fetish" or some such rot! At a certain point some people simply forget that they're supposed to like an actual person, not just the way that person looks.
Just look at all the "ugly duck" movies: a girl is unattractive, a hunk pursues her for whatever idiotic reason, but he doesn't really fall for her until she transforms into this attractive female that was always hiding under those glasses and baggy clothes. Because, naturally, she must be "beautiful" in order to earn his love, it's entirely unacceptable that he should love someone who continues to be unattractive (by the current standards, at least).
I guess my point is, that a lot of effort and advertising money is put into believing "beauty" - the external image - is essential to your success, it can be bought and it will inevitably bring along affection. Yeah, right.
Little man, good luck with keeping your innocence intact for a few more precious years. I hope you can cut through the images of idolized sex, successfully fight the omnipotent greed the consumer society attempts to infect you with and find what you really want in life. You know, little things, like true love, respect for fellow human beings with in all their imperfections, and - last but not least - keep some common sense about you.
1) the little one is too young;
2) the elder one's jaw seems to hit the ground every time there's a (semi) naked lady in sight and he continually comes home from school with questions such as: "Mom, are your titties big?" (insert silly grin) and "Mom, do girls having sex have to have their bras on?" (insert insane neurotic laughter and a gawping face of this mother) - he's 7!!! Seven (with a word, unless someone thinks I mistyped it)! Where does he get the ideas?! What is he discussing with his friends!? Mind you - I use every excuse I can find to keep him off the Internet and when he's using it, it's in the living room, under my supervision. And still he comes home with this.
So, no, it was not my children, but my friend's son (6), who posed the question. Apparently he hasn't been influenced by the overly-sexualized society we live in - yet. She was lost for words. I felt like saying: you'll understand, little man, in about 10 years, when the hormones kick in. But then, perhaps, it will be the right time for him to understand, the teenage years are meant to be over-flooded with thoughts and shifting mind-sets regarding sexuality, while this type of question makes perfect sense to me from the stand-point of a confused child, growing up in a society where sex sell practically anything from cars to washing powders and is, as such, beyond his comprehension.
But the overly-sexualized society is our sad reality and hardly any innocence is left once it's done with the kids - and at the very young age at that, as my son's inappropriate questions attest to! Too bad that most of the time the concepts like love and genuine affection get lost in the onslaught of sensory experiences, in many ways connected to nudity and the concept of a "perfect body". By the time children hit their teens, they are usually quite brain-washed into believing there is just "one beauty" (and by that I mean beauty ideals, such as being skinny - or muscled, in case of boys; properly made up/groomed to even be presentable - this is where the industry hits with the make up products; and dressed up to fit the latest and the greatest of what's currently "in" - again, much to the joys of many a-industry) - and in many cases beauty and success are strongly related with "having" rather than "being". So we've created a society in which having the latest iPhone by far surpasses the importance of actually being a skilled communicator. Who cares if you can't talk right, as long as you have the means to do it, right?
I suppose it pays off to the capitalist society to make young people believe they are always lacking something - they're never quite as skinny as this or other celebrity, their clothes and accessories NEED to be the latest and the greatest or they'll be the laughing stock and it is producing generations of unhappy young people, some miserably obese, while constantly bothering with diets; literally willing to sell their kidneys on a black market for the newest iPhone! So you have a girl of 12 (I was her au-pair in London back in 1996) who's trying to "shave" her absolutely hair-free legs, because she saw it in a magazine. Another thing I saw when I was in England recently almost flipped me on my large behind: it was absolutely freezing around midnight in the centre of London on a Friday night, but it was swarming with teenage girls in sleeveless low-cut mini-skirts (and purple arms), waiting at the clubs to be allowed in. Is the human instinct to reproduce so strong that it challenges your survival instinct?! I know it's important to fit in, but don't those girls have mothers with more sense than hormones!?
This society is leaving very little room for idiosyncrasy - a lot of people are literally afraid to admit their preferences for something other than what's considered "ideal". If a guy likes a girl with curves, he has a "fat chick fetish" or some such rot! At a certain point some people simply forget that they're supposed to like an actual person, not just the way that person looks.
Just look at all the "ugly duck" movies: a girl is unattractive, a hunk pursues her for whatever idiotic reason, but he doesn't really fall for her until she transforms into this attractive female that was always hiding under those glasses and baggy clothes. Because, naturally, she must be "beautiful" in order to earn his love, it's entirely unacceptable that he should love someone who continues to be unattractive (by the current standards, at least).
I guess my point is, that a lot of effort and advertising money is put into believing "beauty" - the external image - is essential to your success, it can be bought and it will inevitably bring along affection. Yeah, right.
Little man, good luck with keeping your innocence intact for a few more precious years. I hope you can cut through the images of idolized sex, successfully fight the omnipotent greed the consumer society attempts to infect you with and find what you really want in life. You know, little things, like true love, respect for fellow human beings with in all their imperfections, and - last but not least - keep some common sense about you.
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